Friday, January 4, 2013

life is completely absurd right now

just got back from hanging out at the eagle/golden nuggets.
it's weird that the same waitress who used to serve me and aaron is now serving me and Kevin.
when she saw me with him, she looked confused. She literally examined Kevin and took a good look at me to make sure it was really me. I felt like some kind of golden nugget whore.
Heh. It's weird because now I notice her. Before,  like when Aaron came back from San Diego to apologize, it felt like it was just me and him. I didn't care how sappy I must have looked, staring at him. God, what a cheese ball.  A cheese ball that was in love. And it seemed like it would stay that way for a long time. You should have seen all the PDA.
But ey, life happens.
I wonder if she wants to know what happened. It doesn't seem like it. I just know I'd be that type of person. I wonder what its like looking from the outside.
Ironically, I think she was being nicer to me today..,,
Anyway, Kevin knew none of the songs that were playing and I had to dance by myself. Heheh. T'was funny.
I'm going to see him @ 5 tonight.
Is it weird to say that I like him? This fast? After being in a one-year and a 7 month relationship.
Yeah, it might be. But I don't give a shit. It was exhilarating to experience something new.  A different set of lips. A different kind of movement. A different pair of eyes to look into.
He looks like Charlie people, I swear .

This by no means....means.....that I want a 'relationship'. I just want to have fun.

He invited me to go see Excision @ the Congress soon. Fuck yeah! Also, late night movie tomorrow ageen.
Aaron was right. I can't believe how clingy/obsessive I was. Ahhhhhhhhh, I don't want to think about it. Who was that girl?

I'm never giving myself completely to anyone ever again.
Who am I kidding?
I will.

I smell like cologneeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I hate cologneeeeeeeeee


I'm also seeing Cody tomorrow! &  Michelle next week! And Angel sometime this week. And Robbie tomorrow (he's a dog trainer now. wtf! we literally had a conversation about dogs  for an hour lmfao. mark zuckerberg has a dog named Beast. Lmfao you can find him on FB. He looks like Toby).
and juan pablo and conrad!

I like the word zest and exhilaration and exuberance.

Today I screamed at the top of my lungs at 2AM: "I'm GOING TO CALIFORNIA BITCHES!"
Marina said I could stay the weekend with her in Hollywood. ^_^
She is going to draw a nude portrait of me. I can't wait.



my life is a fucking trip.


Okay, so. I'm going to start documenting things. I want to see how things go for me. I want something to go back to when my memories fail me.
Kevin brought up a lot of the times we spent at the Logan skate park and I don't remember shit. Depressing.
Also, it would be good for me to write.
Should I make this private?
I WANT TO BE A SOCIAL FUCKING BUTTERFLY but who can be that for me here?

me and crystal are looking for pot..
I have school in a few hours.....
my new ring came in the mail...


aw yes.

edit:
it's today. yay.

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