I'm carving myself into the person I want to be. I wonder when the carving will stop. When I'll finally be satisfied. If I'll ever be fully satisfied.
Clara likes the fact that I have a journal and wants me to do excercises in them that she gets from this one book. I love exercises! (The mental, not physical kind. Physical kind, stay away! Lol. Just kidding. I need to start being active.)
In this exercise, I had to do character sketches. I wrote about a person I despised. A person I admired. A friendship I hold close to me.
In doing so, you find out a lot about yourself as well as the person you're writing about. If you end up writing a dialogue peice or a letter, the character sketch served it's purpose. Mine started off as lists and slowly transitioned to letters. ^-^. It was pretty cool. I felt like I was diving into a thought; exploring a part of my mind even further.
The people I wrote about in response to the question "who do I admire" were Yerika, Kristina, Paul McCartney, Charles Bukowski, and Kathleen Hanna.
I want to talk about Kathleen Hanna.
Kathleen Hanna is the lead singer of Le Tigre and BIKINI KILL(!). She has an amazing voice, as well as philosophy. She used to be all like "fuck you men", but gradually began to understand feminism for what it really was. I admire her ability to be self-sufficient, inform others on a cause that she passionately cares about through her music, the fact that she doesn't wear make-up, and the fact that she supports movements and causes. In other words, she practices what she preaches. I also like how she doesn't put herself on a pedestal. She's funny. "My dog doesn't care that I'm famous. If I'm not there on Monday to feed him, he's going to be angry with me. Famous or not. I'm just like everyone else. I just happened to love making music." She said something like that. The point's there. I got this from a red-eye article a while back.
I admire her for being the one behind these lyrics:
Don't need you to say we're cute Don't need you to say we're alright Don't need your protection Don't need no kiss goodnight don't need you don't need you us girls don't need you Don't need you to say we're good Don't need you to tell us we suck Don't need your atti-fuckin-Tude boy Don't need your dick to fuck Does it scare you that we don't need you? Does it scare you boy that we don't need you? don't need you don't need you us punk rock whores don't need you
Clara asked me if I thought Kathleen Hanna would have responded to certain situations the way I did. I said hell fucking no. She wouldn't have. She asked me why I am so into feminism, but don't act upon it. I said because I'm trying to. Emotions can really hold back logic from taking action. It's pathetic guys, but I'm working on it. Redemptions can always be made. Lessons can always be learned.
I miss Charlie guys.
I miss Holden too.
I HAVE ORIENTATION TODAY! :)
Okay, the bell rang again. I'm going to go see Yerika perform her monologues. Uuuu. Yay.
P.S I really like Parks & Recreation. I recommend it.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/22/magazine/22Adulthood-t.html?pagewanted=all&_r=0
ReplyDeleteLOL NO NEED TO WORRY.... LOLOLOLOLOL
oh. longer response coming soon.
ReplyDelete“The dreary, dead-end jobs, the bitter divorces, the disappointing and disrespectful children . . . none of them imagine that this is what the future holds for them,” he wrote. Ask them if they agree with the statement “I am very sure that someday I will get to where I want to be in life,” and 96 percent of them will say yes. But despite elements that are exciting, even exhilarating, about being this age, there is a downside, too: dread, frustration, uncertainty, a sense of not quite understanding the rules of the game. More than positive or negative feelings, what Arnett heard most often was ambivalence — beginning with his finding that 60 percent of his subjects told him they felt like both grown-ups and not-quite-grown-ups.
Maybe it’s only now, when young people are allowed to forestall adult obligations without fear of public censure, that the rate of societal maturation can finally fall into better sync with the maturation of the brain."
that's pretty dope. lol
thanks for sharing this with me. it is reassuring. i can't wait to be twenty dude. i'm so excited. i'm more about the process then the result lol. I feel like there is nothing left to do once you get that final result. Maybe nothing left to do but be happy if I made the right decisions. Hmm..I guess I'd like both. I guess when you're thirty, it's time to get comfortable. I guess I'll appreciate them both when their time comes. ^-^
I hope I'm still learning when I'm 50.
okay. that's cool. take your time. waiting on the avril/brit/cristina/pink question lol.
today mister rutter asked me if I was an adult yet lol. I'm still 17..^-^ so I guess I'll appreciate how easy it is to answer that question while I still can. Ha.
When was the first time you realized adults were human? I used to think adults had all the answers. I used to think my mom and dad had their life figured out. That they made the right choices. I never questioned anything.
The first time for me was when my teacher misspelled something and I called her out on it LOLOL.
P.S let me know when you wanna cheell.